This is a question I am often asked by the majority of my women clients, that are seeking relationship advice. I often hear; " I do everything for him, and he doesn't appreciate it". He ignores me when, I ask him, and he never gives me what I need. How can I make him, understand?
This is a typical situation among many women in relationships with men, that deny their partners feelings and make no attempt to understand them or hear what they are saying.
My answer to this is really very simple; We only get in our lives, what we allow. I often switch the problem around, what if you did not do anything for him, and didn't listen to him when he wanted to express his feelings? What if you didn't appreciate him? What would he do?
Chances are he would find someone else? or he would switch roles with you and write me a letter, saying my girlfriend never listens to me, she never appreciates what I do and when I talked to her about it, she dismissed my and my feelings, how can i get her to listen to me? Or this can occur; You can tell him, how you feel one more time, and offer him a chance to make a effort. If he resists, you leave, and you don't turn back. You would want to do this for a number of reasons besides showing him that you respect yourself ( which is considered, highly attractive), you would be showing him, that you are a woman that knows how you should be treated, and are not willing to settle. You would also be enlightening him on all that he is missing, and eventually you will end up with him, coming to you as a brand new man, the one you wanted and deserved to have.
People take things for granted, it's human nature. When something is so reliable we don't appreciate it for that, until it breaks down. We probably would spend the majority of eternity trying to kill each other, if we knew that we could never die. Death makes us appreciate life. So what does this all mean? It means that we often have to be reminded of death or the possibility of loss to appreciate what we have. If he never comes after you, he never loved you, and you need to go about finding someone that does, Because you don't have insecurity issues anymore, after reading this. Empower yourself!
One sure fire way to get want you want is to ask for it, this should naturally happen where the person will want to please you and make you happy. If they don't, why would you want them?
Too many people stay in relationships that are not working in hopes to change the person. They don't realize that they are actually with the wrong person, and are holding their true companion at bay while they try to fix the wrong one.
It is absolutely critical that you are not co-dependent it is a weak and you will not be respected. The reason why "We are not respected" is because we "don't respect our self"! In order to see a change you must, force it. This takes place when you ask for what you want, and if you are not valued for your needs, then you get up and you leave. Sounds scary to most, and they often say " but I love him", I know he can change, if i leave he will just find someone else! My question then becomes, why are you in love with someone that does not care about how you feel enough to listen to you, respect you and make a change? The problem is not with him, it is with you! You are allowing it, so you will continue to get it. He is allowed to treat you how he wishes and you are entitled to take it or not! You see, where I am going with this. You need to not let bad behavior in your life, or it will stay that way. Why should he do what you want, when he doesn't have to? This is not about being a cold uncaring person, this is about demanding respect and getting what you want out of life, and to take a leap because you are worth it is the most fulfilling thing you can do, you feel empowered, because you are! You are now in control of what happens next! and chances are, he will realize this and begin to try to communicate to get you back, because now he knows that you mean business. You had the courage to walk away from what is not working and you are not settling for less. You go girl!
This is a typical situation among many women in relationships with men, that deny their partners feelings and make no attempt to understand them or hear what they are saying.
My answer to this is really very simple; We only get in our lives, what we allow. I often switch the problem around, what if you did not do anything for him, and didn't listen to him when he wanted to express his feelings? What if you didn't appreciate him? What would he do?
Chances are he would find someone else? or he would switch roles with you and write me a letter, saying my girlfriend never listens to me, she never appreciates what I do and when I talked to her about it, she dismissed my and my feelings, how can i get her to listen to me? Or this can occur; You can tell him, how you feel one more time, and offer him a chance to make a effort. If he resists, you leave, and you don't turn back. You would want to do this for a number of reasons besides showing him that you respect yourself ( which is considered, highly attractive), you would be showing him, that you are a woman that knows how you should be treated, and are not willing to settle. You would also be enlightening him on all that he is missing, and eventually you will end up with him, coming to you as a brand new man, the one you wanted and deserved to have.
People take things for granted, it's human nature. When something is so reliable we don't appreciate it for that, until it breaks down. We probably would spend the majority of eternity trying to kill each other, if we knew that we could never die. Death makes us appreciate life. So what does this all mean? It means that we often have to be reminded of death or the possibility of loss to appreciate what we have. If he never comes after you, he never loved you, and you need to go about finding someone that does, Because you don't have insecurity issues anymore, after reading this. Empower yourself!
One sure fire way to get want you want is to ask for it, this should naturally happen where the person will want to please you and make you happy. If they don't, why would you want them?
Too many people stay in relationships that are not working in hopes to change the person. They don't realize that they are actually with the wrong person, and are holding their true companion at bay while they try to fix the wrong one.
It is absolutely critical that you are not co-dependent it is a weak and you will not be respected. The reason why "We are not respected" is because we "don't respect our self"! In order to see a change you must, force it. This takes place when you ask for what you want, and if you are not valued for your needs, then you get up and you leave. Sounds scary to most, and they often say " but I love him", I know he can change, if i leave he will just find someone else! My question then becomes, why are you in love with someone that does not care about how you feel enough to listen to you, respect you and make a change? The problem is not with him, it is with you! You are allowing it, so you will continue to get it. He is allowed to treat you how he wishes and you are entitled to take it or not! You see, where I am going with this. You need to not let bad behavior in your life, or it will stay that way. Why should he do what you want, when he doesn't have to? This is not about being a cold uncaring person, this is about demanding respect and getting what you want out of life, and to take a leap because you are worth it is the most fulfilling thing you can do, you feel empowered, because you are! You are now in control of what happens next! and chances are, he will realize this and begin to try to communicate to get you back, because now he knows that you mean business. You had the courage to walk away from what is not working and you are not settling for less. You go girl!
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